VIDEO: Drunk, knife-wielding monkey threatens bar patrons

This is how Planet of the Apes begins.

A capuchin monkey named Chico terrorized bar patrons in Teixeira, Brazil recently, getting a little tipsy on rum and then brandishing a large knife.

According to the original video (now taken down), the monkey was only attacking men and leaving the women alone. In fact, Chico was gentle with women, even climbing on one's shoulders. Fortunately, only the bar roof felt the brunt of Chico's anger management issues.

It was a bar staff oversight that ended with the monkey drinking some rum and taking the knife. It appears to be a tame monkey, which was seen by patrons before, and it was getting along with some people in the bar, but after he picked up the knife he wanted no man around. When men came close, he was aloof and there was a risk of someone being injured.
— Lt. Col. Saul Laurentino, Teixeira Fire Brigade, 4th Batallion

I mean, I guess a drunk monkey taking a knife is an "oversight." Isn't this a chef's equivalent of a cop letting someone steal their gun?

Monkey Knife Fight Simpsons

The monkey was seen drinking cachaça as patrons ran for their lives.

Chico was eventually apprehended by authorities and brought in to sober up and calm down. According to Russia Today, his mood improved little (probably had a mega-hangover), as he threatened children near a nature preserve.

No charges have been brought against Chico.

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